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A cautionary tale about handles on plastic doors

2022 — “Here’s some thought leadership for you: stick it up yer ar—” → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

Drowning in The How

2022 — “Sorry mate. You ‘erd of TikTok?” → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

A Little Elon Gated

2022 — A short story about buyer’s remorse → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

On being weirder

2022 — And my plans for this Substack going forward → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

Michael Maher’s Strange Obsession

2022 — He’d brought his kitchen knife with him, just to chop his sandwich in half → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

The Three Commenteers

2022 — A short story about committing antagonistic word acts outside of your jurisdiction → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

Round-up #1 — Over a year in

2022 — More round-up than a Hollywood cowboy film, more learnings than a Twitter thread (probably) → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

Tesco Value Popcorn [republished]

2022 — Completely devoid of any branding and personality in an effort to save you time when it comes to consuming it. → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

Observitude, Part One

2022 — Surprisingly, I was walking down a corridor. → Read it on Substack
burgle.xyz › writing › essays

The Sh*t Content Self Referrential Magical Roundabout

2022 — Even this subtitle references the main title by pointing out 'self referrential' is spelled wrong. It's actually one r in the middle → Read it on Substack
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